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“Another period. Another pregnancy lost. A child stillborn. Different paths toward emptiness—all devastating. Even if we try to pray, our prayers often crumble in our souls, our dreams dissolve in our hearts. Despair seeps in the doors, taps at the windows, and threatens to clog all our passages of hope. How can we speak softly to God when we see, yet again, the fruitless stain of our blood; when we feel the lifeless mass slipping from our womb; or when we hold a beautiful, perfect but still child in our arms? For some of us, no amount of explanation—medical or theological—can soothe.” —Rabbi Nina Beth Cardin, Tears of Sorrow, Seeds of Hope: A Jewish Spiritual Companion For Infertility and Pregnancy Loss
This ceremony uses the occasion of havdalah, the service separating Shabbat from the week, to mourn a miscarriage
A poem expressing the deep emotions of a miscarriage
A personal account describing the author’s experience of losing a baby before rituals were developed to encourage mourning
A mourning ceremony for twins who died before birth
A prayer combining contemporary words and Hebrew selections from the High Holy Day Amidah (standing silent prayer)
A prayer to be said in synagogue for a couple who has experienced a miscarriage
Selections and adaptations from a larger ceremony
How one woman infused the tashlikh ritual with a dimension for coping with her loss
Havdalah ceremony after a miscarriage or abortion
The author suggests adding an unlit candle to the Shabbat candlelabrum each week until the baby is born
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