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New Simanim for a New Year (5781)

a picnic basket in a field of grass and flowers, on top is a thermos, mug, apples, and cookies.
 
סימנים חדשים לשנה חדשה (תשפ״א)
 
This ritual was created in response to this difficult past year, with a drought in Arizona, wildfires on the West Coast and the coronavirus pandemic. This is based upon the ritual of eating symbolic foods on Rosh Hashanah.
 

 
Suggested foods: tofu, ice cream, beer, and something nice to drink (liquor, soda, etc.)
 
1. Drought: Arizona just experienced its driest summer ever recorded. We need rain, so let’s eat tofu (evoking the drops of rain – tiftuf טפטוף in Hebrew) …
 
יהי רצון מלפניך ה׳ אלוקינו ואלוקי אבותינו, שבשנה החדשה יטפטפו השמים.
 
Yehi ratzon milfanekha, Adonai Eloheinu ve’Elohei Avoteinu, shebashanah hakhadashah yetaftefu hashamayim.
 
May it be your will, O Lord our God and God of our Forefathers, that in the new year the heavens will drip forth rain.
 
2. Heat: Arizona just experienced its hottest summer ever recorded. We need cooler — even cold — weather, so let’s eat ice cream …
 
.יהי רצון מלפניך ה׳ אלוקינו ואלוקי אבותינו, שבשנה החדשה יתקרר אווירינו כגלידה 
 
Yehi ratzon milfanekha, Adonai Eloheinu ve’Elohei Avoteinu, shebashanah hakhadashah yitkarer avirenu kaglidah.
 
May it be your will, O Lord our God and God of our Forefathers, that in the new year the air around us will become as cold as ice cream.
 
3. Fire: The West is ablaze, as our hazy skies remind us daily. So let’s symbolically douse the burning (be’ira בעירה in Hebrew) by drinking beer (bira בירה in Hebrew).
 
 יהי רצון מלפניך ה׳ אלוקינו ואלוקי אבותינו, שבשנה החדשה הבעירה במערב ארצות הברית תתהפך בבירה.
 
Yehi ratzon milfanekha, Adonai Eloheinu ve’Elohei Avoteinu, shebashanah hakhadashah habe’irah bama’arav artzot tithapekh bebira.  
 
May it be your will, O Lord our God and God of our Forefathers, that in the new year the burning in the Western United States will be replaced with beer.
 
4. Covid: We are all eager to remove our masks, but of course we won’t do so until our scientists and doctors tell us we can. In the meantime, let’s drink something real nice (mashke משקה in Hebrew) to wash away our sorrow …
 
יהי רצון מלפניך ה׳ אלוקינו ואלוקי אבותינו, שבשנה החדשה תרדנה מסכותינו מפנינו כמשקאות הזורמים בגרוננו.
 
Yehi ratzon milfanekha, Adonai Eloheinu ve’Elohei Avoteinu, shebashanah hakhadashah teredna masekhoteinu mipaneinu kamashka’ot hazormim begaronenu.  
 
May it be your will, O Lord our God and God of our Forefathers, that in the new year the masks will descend from our faces like the drinks flowing down our throats.
 
שנה טובה!
 
Shanah Tovah!

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