It’s 3:00 a.m.
I can’t sleep.
I am awake.
I am heartbroken.
I am exhausted.
I am spent.
I am raw.
I cry.
I cry for the children.
I cry for the grandparents.
I cry for the parents.
I cry for the young adults.
I cry for their families.
I cry for their friends.
I cry for us all.
I mourn.
I mourn for lives lost and lives that are forever altered.
I mourn for murdered victims and their loved ones.
I mourn for kidnapped victims and their loved ones.
I mourn for injured victims and their loved ones.
I mourn for families with gaping holes that will never be filled.
I mourn for music lovers for whom concerts will never be the same.
I mourn for current and past kibbutz residents for whom kibbutz life will never be the same.
I mourn for ordinary people in IsraelLit. ''the one who struggles with God.'' Israel means many things. It is first used with reference to Jacob, whose name is changed to Israel (Genesis 32:29), the one who struggles with God. Jacob's children, the Jewish people, become B'nai Israel, the children of Israel. The name also refers to the land of Israel and the State of Israel. and all over the world for whom Israel will never be the same.
I mourn for Israel, which will never be the same.
I fear.
I fear war.
I fear for the people living in Israel.
I fear for the innocent people living in Gaza.
I fear for our IDF soldiers, little more than children themselves.
I fear for what this war will bring to the Jewish people across the world.
I fear for all who are experiencing even more antisemitism.
I fear for the future of Israel.
I fear for our future in the diaspora.
I worry.
I worry about the fate of the hostages.
I worry about people anxiously awaiting news of their loved ones.
I worry about people mourning the deaths of their loved ones.
I worry about innocent civilians caught in the crossfire.
I worry about the shaping of world opinion by propaganda and hatred.
I worry about seeing pictures that will break me.
I worry about reading news that will break me.
I worry about hearing stories that will break me.
I worry about the divides this is creating between people.
I worry about the friendships that have already been damaged and broken.
I grieve.
I grieve the loss of life.
I grieve the loss of innocent life.
I grieve the inevitable further loss of innocent life.
I grieve the loss of a way of life.
I grieve the loss of humanity.
I pray.
I pray for a swift end to this unwanted war.
I pray for innocents to be spared injury, death and heartache.
I pray for Israel to maintain its commitment to life.
I pray for the world to affirm Israel’s right to exist.
I pray for Israel to feel safe again.
I pray for the people living in Israel to feel safe again.
I pray for the people living in Gaza to feel safe again.
I pray for the suffering to end.
And I hope.
I hope that all people in the region will find a way to live in harmony with one another.
I hope that we all learn to love our neighbors as ourselves.
I hope that we begin to see every other person as b’tzelem Elohim, in the image of God.
I hope – and I pray – for peace.
