It’s 3:00 a.m. and I Can’t Sleep

It’s 3:00 a.m.

I can’t sleep.

I am awake.

I am heartbroken.

I am exhausted.

I am spent.

I am raw.

I cry.

I cry for the children.

I cry for the grandparents.

I cry for the parents.

I cry for the young adults.

I cry for their families.

I cry for their friends.

I cry for us all.

I mourn.

I mourn for lives lost and lives that are forever altered.

I mourn for murdered victims and their loved ones.

I mourn for kidnapped victims and their loved ones.

I mourn for injured victims and their loved ones.

I mourn for families with gaping holes that will never be filled.

I mourn for music lovers for whom concerts will never be the same.

I mourn for current and past kibbutz residents for whom kibbutz life will never be the same.

I mourn for ordinary people in and all over the world for whom Israel will never be the same.

I mourn for Israel, which will never be the same.

I fear.

I fear war.

I fear for the people living in Israel.

I fear for the innocent people living in Gaza.

I fear for our IDF soldiers, little more than children themselves.

I fear for what this war will bring to the Jewish people across the world.

I fear for all who are experiencing even more antisemitism.

I fear for the future of Israel.

I fear for our future in the diaspora.

I worry.

I worry about the fate of the hostages.

I worry about people anxiously awaiting news of their loved ones.

I worry about people mourning the deaths of their loved ones.

I worry about innocent civilians caught in the crossfire.

I worry about the shaping of world opinion by propaganda and hatred.

I worry about seeing pictures that will break me.

I worry about reading news that will break me.

I worry about hearing stories that will break me.

I worry about the divides this is creating between people.

I worry about the friendships that have already been damaged and broken.

I grieve.

I grieve the loss of life.

I grieve the loss of innocent life.

I grieve the inevitable further loss of innocent life.

I grieve the loss of a way of life.

I grieve the loss of humanity.

I pray.

I pray for a swift end to this unwanted war.

I pray for innocents to be spared injury, death and heartache.

I pray for Israel to maintain its commitment to life.

I pray for the world to affirm Israel’s right to exist.

I pray for Israel to feel safe again.

I pray for the people living in Israel to feel safe again.

I pray for the people living in Gaza to feel safe again.

I pray for the suffering to end.

And I hope.

I hope that all people in the region will find a way to live in harmony with one another.

I hope that we all learn to love our neighbors as ourselves.

I hope that we begin to see every other person as b’tzelem Elohim, in the image of God.

I hope – and I pray – for peace.

It’s 3:00 a.m. and I Can’t Sleep

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