Naming (and gendering) a baby is tricky enough without having to worry about being misgendered while doing it. The following prayer was modified for Rafi Daugherty’s gestational children. Rafi chose to gender his children according to their alleged sexes in utero. The following paragraphs utlize both a feminine and masculine form for G-d but only a masculine form for the gestational father.
For a daughter: Eloheinu ve’elohei avoteinu v’imateinu ka’yemi et ha’yalda ha’zot le’aviha ve’tikrei sh’mah be’yisrael _Name_ bat _Father’s Name_. Yis’mach ha’av b’pri bitno. Timchi ba ve’chazki ota be’etz chayim karvi ota le’toratech lamdi ota mitzvotayich ve’hori la darkech. Hati libah le’ahavah ule’yirah et sh’mech. Hodu la’donai ki tov ki le’olam chasdo zot hak’tana _Name_ bat _Father’s Name_ g’dolah te’hiyeh. K’shem she’nichnesah la’britLit. Covenant. Judaism is defined by the covenant - the contract between the Jewish people and God. God promises to make us abundant and to give us the land of Israel; we promise to obey God's commandments. This covenant begins with Abraham and is reiterated throughout the Torah. A brit milah, literally a covenant of circumcision, is often simply called a brit or bris. ken tikanes le’torahThe Five Books of Moses, and the foundation of all of Jewish life and lore. The Torah is considered the heart and soul of the Jewish people, and study of the Torah is a high mitzvah. The Torah itself a scroll that is hand lettered on parchment, elaborately dressed and decorated, and stored in a decorative ark. It is chanted aloud on Mondays, Thursdays, and Shabbat, according to a yearly cycle. Sometimes "Torah" is used as a colloquial term for Jewish learning and narrative in general. ul’chupah ul’ma’asim tovimLit. Good deeds. The traditional prayer for a newborn infant at his or her brit milah or baby naming concludes, "May s/he grow to Torah, to Chuppah, and to ma'asim tovim.".
Our God and God of our ancestors sustain this child for her father and let her be called in IsraelLit. ''the one who struggles with God.'' Israel means many things. It is first used with reference to Jacob, whose name is changed to Israel (Genesis 32:29), the one who struggles with God. Jacob's children, the Jewish people, become B'nai Israel, the children of Israel. The name also refers to the land of Israel and the State of Israel., _Name_ daughter of_Father’s Name_. May the father rejoice in the fruit of his womb. Support her and strengthen her in the tree of life, bring her close to Your Torah, teach her Your MitzvotLit. Commandment. It is traditionally held that there are 613 mitzvot (plural) in Judaism, both postive commandments (mandating actions) and negative commandments (prohibiting actions). Mitzvah has also become colloquially assumed to mean the idea of a “good deed.", and show her Your way. Grant her heart to love and to feel awe for Your name. Give thanks to God; God’s mercy is eternal. May this little one, _Name_, grow big. As she has entered into the covenant, so may she enter into a life of Torah, loving relationships and good deeds.
For a son: Eloheinu ve’elohei avoteinu v’imateinu ka’yem et ha’yeled ha’zeh le’aviv ve’yikaray sh’mo be’yisrael _Name_ ben _Father’s Name_. Yis’mach ha’av b’pri bitno. Timchi bo ve’chazki oto be’etz chayim karvi oto le’toratech lamdi oto mitzvotayich ve’hori lo darkech. Hati libo le’ahavah ule’yirah et sh’mech. Hodu la’donai ki tov ki le’olam chasdo zeh hak’tan _Name_ ben _Father’s Name_ gadol ye’hiyeh. K’shem she’nikhnas la’brit ken yikanes le’torah ul’chupah ul’ma’asim tovim.
Our God and God of our ancestors sustain this child for his father and let him be called in Israel, _Name_ son of _Father’s Name_. May the father rejoice in the fruit of his womb. Support him and strengthen him in the tree of life, bring him close to Your Torah, teach him Your Mitzvot, and show him Your way. Grant his heart to love and to feel awe for Your name. Give thanks to God; God’s mercy is eternal. May this little one, _Name_, grow big. As he has entered into the covenant, so may he enter into a life of Torah, loving relationships, and good deeds.