When I feel most broken
pulled apart    when every door unhinged
is opened     but feels closed
for too many paths there  then it is
prayer   with past intention   wells up
and present air so bright   it nearly
suffocates   with future deep
and full beyond knowing.   The spinning
on the head of a pin   who is angel   real?
All the company there   here   messengers
to and for each other?   My dearest
friends   closest-to-heart   flailing as I
in cavernous winds   bodies ailing
strewn right and left   and it is
somewhere decreed   not by punishing
judge   but somehow   maybe just the air
we breathe    Who shall live and who shall
die?   Weep and laugh with the same sigh
at the take and give life brings   whispers
sings   shouts in the ear   and hear
try to hear   can’t help but hear   wisdom.
Gasp for   try and grasp without grasping
all the syllables   all the hip hop un-
understood   the bass too loud   the
thumping in my chest I want a rest from
not permanently though.   I want to hear
the words   get their gist.    TV    internet
fireflies       Torah’s music   all electric pulse
saving me   from ann-I-hilation?
Here am IÂ Â Â waiting.
I am here.
