Is there another way to look at life and death, that isn’t through a lens of fear and trembling?

"The pause is mine. Hamotzi. All mine..."

"I would lean into the darkness"

They kept telling me that once we got through the terrible summer, the “summer of yuck” as we called it, that I would find light, happiness and health. They tried to reassure me, as we checked each week of chemo off the calendar, that I was one step closer to relief, to a happy ending, to life after cancer. They promised – everyone promised – that I’d feel better, that I’d resume work and parenting and everything in between, and that I’d be able to put cancer far behind me and move on.