Jewish Wedding Checklist

Task

When

Who

Choose a date for your wedding in consultation with clergy and family

1 year in advance

Decide on budget and style

1 year in advance

Scout out and choose a reception site

9–11 months in advance

Begin working on guest list and request lists from parents

9–11 months in advance

Choose a caterer

9–11 months in advance

Begin shopping for a gown

6–8 months in advance

Finalize guest list

6–8 months in advance

Meet with rabbi to discuss ceremony; set up prenuptial meetings

6 months in advance

Book a band

6 months in advance

Choose a gown

4–6 months in advance

Book a calligrapher to make your ketubahThe Jewish wedding contract. Traditionally, the ketubah protected the wife in marriage by spelling out the husband's obligations to her and guaranteeing her a financial settlement in case of divorce. Throughout the ages, ketubot (plural) have been illuminated and calligraphed, becoming significant as Jewish art. Today, all manner of egalitarian ketubot are written. Some dispense with the financial and legal aspects, focusing more on the emotional and spiritual sides of the relationship. Others maintain the rabbis' concern with the practical, but define mutual obligations for each spouse.

6 months in advance

Book a photographer

4–6 months in advance

Register for wedding gifts

4–6 months in advance

Set aside a block of hotel rooms for out of town guests

4–6 months in advance

Decide on wording for invitation

4–6 months in advance

Decide on text for ketubah

4–6 months in advance

Order invitations

4-6 months in advance

Book a baker for the wedding cake

2–4 months in advance

Order kippot and bentschers

2–4 months in advance

Reserve rental equipment if necessary

2–4 months in advance

Plan your honeymoon

2-4 months in advance

Book hotel room for wedding night

2–4 months in advance

Buy wedding rings

2–3 months in advance

Compile packages for out of town guests to be mailed with invitations

2–3 months in advance

Decide on chuppah – florist, tallisA four-cornered garment to which ritual fringes (tzitzit/tzitzi'ot) are affixed. The knots in the fringes represent the name of God and remind us of God's commandments. The tallit is worn during prayer and can also be drawn about oneself or around the bride and groom to symbolize divine protection., how you will construct it

2–3 months in advance

Purchase other clothing – veil, stockings, shoes, etc.

2–3 months in advance

Send out wedding invitations

6 weeks in advance

As you receive gifts, update registry, and send out thank you notes

6 weeks in advance

Order liquor, wine, etc.

6 weeks in advance

Map out whole ceremony

6 weeks in advance

If you want friends to perform or read something, invite them to do so

6 weeks in advance

Decide on and plan pre-wedding ceremonies – tischLit. Table (Yiddish) A festive meal that combines teaching Torah and telling jokes.  At a traditional wedding, a groom’s tisch is held, during which the groom attempts to teach words of Torah while his friends interrupt with songs and jokes. Today, some brides hold a tisch as well, and some couples hold one together., bedecken, kabalat panim

4 weeks in advance

If you will be celebrating sheva berachot after the wedding work out schedule of locations and guests

4 weeks in advance

Choose witnesses who will sign ketubah

3–4 weeks in advance

GetA writ of divorce. Traditionally, only a man can grant his wife a get. Liberal Jews have amended this tradition, making divorce more egalitarian. marriage license

2–3 weeks in advance

Have a final meeting with rabbi

2–3 weeks in advance

Work out wedding day timing and details, who picks up when where, etc.

1–2 weeks in advance

Write and print out wedding booklets

1–2 weeks in advance

Determine wedding day assignments

1–2 weeks in advance

Confirm all service providers – caterer, band, etc.

1–2 weeks in advance

Go the mikvehThe ritual bath. The waters of the mikveh symbolically purify – they are seen as waters of rebirth. A convert immerses in the mikveh as part of conversion. Many Orthodox married women go to the mikveh following their period and before resuming sexual relations. Couples go to the mikveh before being married. Many, including some men, immerse before Yom Kippur; some go every Friday before Shabbat.

1–3 days before wedding

Bring props – kiddushThe prayer recited over wine on Shabbat, holidays, and other joyous occasions. cups, ketubah, etc., – to wedding site

Day before