A Ritual to Prepare for the Yizkor of Yom Kippur

 

Bowl of water

Piece of water-soluable paper and non-toxic pen (such as Paper Mate Retractable Gel Pen).

 

1. Before Yom KippurThe holiest day of the Jewish year and the culmination of a season of self-reflection. Jews fast, abstain from other worldly pleasures, and gather in prayers that last throughout the day. Following Ne'ilah, the final prayers, during which Jews envision the Gates of Repentance closing, the shofar is sounded in one long blast to conclude the holy day. It is customary to begin building one's sukkah as soon as the day ends., as part of your spiritual preparation for the High Holy Days, write on the dissolvable paper an act of tzedekah that you will carry out in the coming year in honor of the memory(ies) of your loved one(s) — perhaps a donation that you will make to a specific cause or an action that you pledge to take.

 

You may also wish to add a line from a prayer, poem or song, an intention or a memory—a few words that capture your thoughts and feelings as the year/another year begins without the physical presence of your loved one(s).

 

Have a small bowl of water ready.

 

2. Listen to the calls of the shofar: tekiah / truah / shevarim

 

The sound of the shofar calls us to awaken: it is the cry of our souls. The broken sounds emitted by the shofar are intended to crack open our hearts and awaken us to deep emotions. The faltering sounds of shevarim/krekhtz are the sound of sobs, of utmost brokenness; they return our souls to the place of broken-heartedness that we experienced during our first experience of mourning. They are cries of release even as they stir us to response.

 

3. Read or Speak this kavannahLit. Intention Refers both to one’s intention when performing a mitzvah or when focusing for prayer. Kavanah also refers to specific readings to help focus one's attention prior to performing an act.:

 

As the sobs of SarahThe first matriarch, wife of Abraham, and mother of Isaac, whom she birthed at the age of 90. Sarah, in Rabbinic tradition, is considered holy, beautiful, and hospitable. Many prayers, particularly the Amidah (the central silent prayer), refer to God as Magen Avraham – protector of Abraham. Many Jews now add: pokehd or ezrat Sarah – guardian or helper of Sarah. Imeinu and Sisera’s mother, grieving the loss of their sons, are replicated by the sobbing calls of the shofar, so may our grief find release through allowing it to be expressed.

 

As this new year begins, may our pain be soothed through the action that we take — the tzedekah that we have pledged.

 

We don’t deny our brokenness. We carry our brokenness and sadness with us. But we strive to transform our brokeness and sadness to hopeful deeds in honor and memory of our beloveds and their values, with the aim of joining in the continuous, onging rectification of our world in the name(s) of those we love.

 

May we be blessed with peace. May our memories become blessings.

 

4. Slide the paper into the bowl water, the element of transformation, the element that sustains life.

 

5. As you watch the paper dissolve, allow your thoughts to turn to your loved ones and to the actions that you have pledged to take in this coming year to elevate their souls and yours, to enact the reality that their memories will be be for abiding blessings.

 

6. At the end of Yom Kippur, pour out the water — if possible, use it to water a tree or plant so as to nourish life.