Preserve the memory of your loved one with a plaque on our Yahrzeit Wall. Learn More ->

Search
Close this search box.
Home » Blog » Interfaith Family Ritual for Hanukkah and Christmas? Well, Actually, No.

Interfaith Family Ritual for Hanukkah and Christmas? Well, Actually, No.

Our aim is not to mix or blend, but to honor and respect both religions.

We’re an interfaith family celebrating both family religions—in our case, Judaism and Christianity. That makes me one of the 25% of all intermarried Jewish parents raising kids “partly Jewish and partly something else,” according to Pew Research. In our case, that means we stress religious literacy for our children, and explain the historical meanings of both Hanukkah and Christmas. Rather than instructing them that one set of beliefs or the other is right or wrong, we aim to ensure that they have a deeper understanding of their family heritage than they would get from osmosis and exposure to secular celebrations of the December holidays.

So, while some secular interfaith families do integrate the holidays, hanging tinsel on the hanukkiah (Hanukkah menorah) and setting out latkes for Santa, our family does not. We give Hanukkah its own place and time, and specific stories, so that our children understand it in historical context. And we strive to return Christmas to all of its religious origins (including the Pagan context of the tree and mistletoe, and the birth of a Jewish baby who would eventually become the focus of Christianity).

So, even though we provide interfaith education to our interfaith children, both at home and in an interfaith families community, we do not integrate the two religions. Our aim is not to mix or blend, but to honor and respect both religions. Of course, the common theme of light in the darkness at a time near the winter solstice is a theme shared by Hanukkah, Christmas, the Pagan tradition of Yule, and the celebration of Diwali by many Hindus, Sikhs, Jains and Buddhists. So Jewish/Christian children, and Jewish/Hindu children, and Jewish/Pagan children, are bound to get the message that there are universal ideas, such as comfort at the darkest time of year, inspiring the evolution of religious rituals.


Susan Katz Miller’s book, Being Both: Embracing Two Religions in One Interfaith Family is available from Beacon Press. She writes for onbeingboth.com, Huffington Post Religion, and the Jewish Daily Forward.

Get the latest from Ritualwell delivered to your inbox.

Facebook
Email

The Reconstructionist Network

Serving as central organization of the Reconstructionist movement

Training the next generation of groundbreaking rabbis

Modeling respectful conversations on pressing Jewish issues

Curating original, Jewish rituals, and convening Jewish creatives

Join author Evonne Marzouk to find ways to strengthen your experience as a spiritual being, expand your consciousness and deepen your ability to be present. Through study and creative writing, you’ll take away new strategies to use in daily life. 

Hope you’ll join us!

Get the latest from Ritualwell

Subscribe for the latest rituals, online learning opportunities, and unique Judaica finds from our store.

The Reconstructionist Network